Try your best to be disciplined: New steps

First thing is that I have been living quite a carefree life right now, so I need to stop it. I need to turn up that motivating factor in me alive and start working.

1) I will join a coaching center and study 5 hours everyday, 2 hours for accounts compulsory.

2) I will join the gym to stay mentally and physically fit.

3) I will sleep only 6 hours a day no matter what.

4) I will start eating only healthy food and fruits and vegetables.

5) I will help out with the internet work every day.

6) I will do everything and anything neatly and in the best possible way. I will strive for perfection.

7) I cannot run away from life, so I will face life and people bravely, no matter what.

I just do not want to give up as yet.

I have decided not to quit no matter the consequences

Well today i wrote my first exam in accounts and to be truthful, it was really bad. Actually, I thought I had prepared well, at least I would manage to pass some way or the other. But that was not suppose to happen. I had studied some earlier chapters before and when exam time was coming I had forgotten it all. This have actually left me confused if I should still continue with CA or not. The thing is that as much as I want to be a CA, I am also scared of the humiliation that I will face when I do not clear the exam. I keep thinking what will I tell my parents an my friends? But as much as I know, I really do not want to work the same way that I had worked in Deutsche Bank. That was just not me. At the same, it is more embarrassing to tell my friends that I had quit CA.

Well, I know many friends who have quit after giving the exam but I think it is because they have not given it enough. To be truthful, I could have done it better but I was not really motivated enough. I need to keep myself motivated all the time. I did not work hard enough. But I really do not want to quit and in fact, I really want to pass this exam very badly. I do not know why but my instincts keep telling me to give one more try. And I promise I would not let anyone down. I will learn from my mistakes, rise the occasion and give it a try again!

How I should have the spirit of not giving up?

Well, to start with, I will say I have been thinking of studying a lot..lot! But the thing is that I do not know why but I always end up searching reasons not to study. One of the most important thing that I have to analyze is if I really want to become a CA...!!!

1)And the reason why I am asking that is because now, I have started seeing money...in the sense I know ways to earn money...more than a CA can earn! So, I am distracted!

2) I am still terrified of anything related to accounts...I really don't know why. Now, I am a little better than before...I think!

3) I am lazy...I know too many ways to timepass..like surfing...(useless)...then there is movies...n anything...that will just let me stay away from my books!

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Solution: I have seen many of my friends who just use to study only 1 week before the exam and sue to get above 85%. The reason is that when they study only for a week..they put their whole soul, mind and body in their studies.
That should be the way I should study...If I study really really hard..I can easily clear the exams.

1) After analyzing everything, I came to know that I still want to be a CA. I still want to have a good qualification in my hand.
Reason:
When I was working in DB I really did not like being one of the graduates doing minor dat analyst jobs. I wanted to be the Assistant Vice President and the only way is to be a CA.

I want to create a status and an iddentity of my own...n CA is great way to tell people "I am a CA"

I know many of my friends who are professionals like army, engineers, doctors etc...I also want to proudly say"I am a CA"

People keep saying"CA is too tough and very less manipuris are CAs" Well, I want to one of those few proud manipuri CAs"

I really want to make my parents and bro and sis to be proud of me.

Well, even if they do not admit, I know a lot of people are jealous of me...well..i want to make them more jealous.

2) About accounts, I worked on it like 1 month and I am pretty confident about the subject...even if I do not get great marks, I know I will pass.

3) Then about sleeping problem, I really have to make myself really disciplined and sleep less and study more.

So, in the end I can proudly say "I want to become a CA"